Granting Children Their Emotions

The Out of the Box Training Kit, “Granting Children Their Emotions” is full of ways adults can honor and support children’s emotional expressions. This is perhaps even more important than ever, since during this time of global crisis children’s emotions are often affected by adults’ worry or preoccupation.

Ilse Elisabeth Plattner, who wrote the foundational article for the Training Kit, provides some examples of ways we adult might unwittingly ignore or invalidate children’s emotions if we are not careful:

“At the airport: A little girl, about two and a half years old, stands in front of the chairs where the adults sit, heartbreakingly crying, tears rolling down her face. The mother looks away, so does the grandmother. Both look in the opposite direction of the child, as if neither hear the child nor belong with the child.

In the supermarket: A boy, about four years old, walks backwards along the side of the trolley that is pushed by the father and the mother. The boy cries furiously, his face blushed, his nose is running; he attempts to face the parents, but he cannot get their attention.

Sabrina, three years old, refuses to leave the car. She does not want to enter the aunt's house because she is terribly afraid of her dog. The aunt walks towards the car, with a smile on her face, the dog at her side, emphasising that this dog is a very nice one and does not do any harm.”

The author urges us all to acknowledge children’s personal experiences with the world, validating individual emotions, whatever they may be.

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